Letter to my future self

Posted: September 30, 2010 in final folio

I have sat staring at a blank screen for a while now wondering what exactly I should say in this letter. I could of course just simply list the achievements that I wish to have accomplished within the next year but lets be honest you already know what I wanted so why would you want to read about it again. Plus I have the love of my life and that is all I really need to be the consistent factor between me and you, and I assure you as I assure myself right now it will be a constant, the light that guides me to you. Although I would prefer to still be alive and well and with no broken bones but that is for fate to decide not me or you to promise to one another.

The longer I sit here and think about what I want to say to you and what I want to write I keep coming back to the knowledge that I don’t know you and I never will. You could be so very different to me in every respect I wouldn’t recognise you if you were described to me in the greatest detail. However, while I don’t know you, you know me like no-one else ever could. You know the dreams I hold, the desires I possess and the plans I have made. This letter to you will just bring your mind back to the past, to this moment where you are sitting on your bed thinking about what you want for the next year and realising that what you want in the next year is what you already have right now. Dreams for my next year revolve around what I’ve already achieved. Sure new things are opening up in our life, university is a major step but I know I want worry and will do my best and that is all I can ask of you.

While I have been focusing on what I want in the next year I have found myself desiring one thing above all others. A letter from you.

What joy it would be to hold a letter from my future self. To read about the twists and turns that I have to face, the decisions that I will make, or more importantly those decisions that I should have made. To read about the dreams I will one day have will be far more thrilling than reading about the ones you have already held. As a side note you could even include a couple of numbers that would give me a million more reasons to be happy with my life.

Alas the childish hopes of a letter from my future self with the lottery numbers will stay a fantastic albeit pointless dream. I could say I want the rest of my hopes to become a reality but my dreams may not be your dreams, my hopes and aspirations may change and evolve over the next year and what I write down now could mean nothing at all to you. You may scoff and laugh as you think back on me right now, what childish hopes I held you may think but I write to you with the optimism I always wish to hold, the joy I always wish to feel and the dreams I always want to dream. I don’t want to lose my dream of being a professional writer I want you to hold the same desire, to follow it through with enthusiasm and to never lose sight of the goal, your name on a book and a loving wife and family to come home to at night. I can truly say that is the only dream I need you to still possess the others are all yours, make them up as you go along dream big, dream small I do not mind so long as you follow them through to the end and enjoy the pursuit of happiness.

I have one year to make your chance at life as easy as possible and so it is my turn to promise something to you. I will do my best at every endeavour I undertake. I will be focused, I will be ambitious, I will not sit back and watch the world pass me by with its tongues sticking out at the lazy guy on the sofa. I will strive forward, I will push the boundaries of my life outwards and in return you get a good chance at life and can continue what I start. Enjoy the independence of university, experience the independence of your own place and enjoy the grandeur of youth before it is snatched away. Please don’t grow up too quickly my friend. Savour the excitement of the red man with a long beard, don’t forget his joy. Keep it, nurture it and let it out in a fiery display of passion.

Just enjoy your life, make it a good one for us both and for everyone we know and love.

Goodbye stranger, the day you are reading this is the first day of your life. Mine is done and I trust you to continue it as best you can. I know you will and that is why I look forward to a good year left of my life before you have your turn. Just know that while I shall never get to meet you, never get to shake your hand or talk with you I love you and am proud of who you are.

Take us to the end my friend, take us to our final breath and make it a journey of style.

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